Dream Visit from Ray

I never know when I will get a visit from Ray (or his HS anyway). It just happens and, as usual, I ended up in tears.

Dream Visit from Ray

The dream was semi-lucid. I was outside my mom’s house in the country. The vegetation indicated it was winter; everything was brown or gray in color. A bit of color caught my eye. It was a vibrant, burgundy red. When I went for a closer look, I saw it was a large, wilted flower that resembled a dying rose. On the flower was movement. I looked and saw it was covered in small, burgundy butterflies. When they stopped moving they were practically undetectable. Fascinated, I took out my phone and began snapping pics of the butterflies. I walked around the backside of the flower to see if I could find anymore. To my surprise, the entire back of the flower was enveloped in an enormous white moth. I carefully took a photo of it, making sure not to scare it. 

The next thing I remember is laying in the grass outside my mom’s house looking up at the sky. My feet were stretched out in front of me. I felt covered by by a warm blanket, as if I were laying in my bed. My toes touched a leg that was positioned across from me. To my left was someone’s head. They were laying face down. I knew immediately who was it was.

I touched the top of his head softly and spoke to him. The words I spoke are lost to me now but it was in line with, “I love it when you visit me” and “Why are you laying face down?” His reply was similar to, “I wanted to check in on you to see how you’re doing.” I don’t remember him answering my question about why he was face down. I also don’t remember seeing or feeling his body. Was he just a disembodied head? 

As usual with such encounters, I was overwhelmed with love for him. While snuggling close to him (well close to his head anyway), I felt a very cold foot touch mine. I said to him, “Wow! You’re feet are cold!” He said, “Those aren’t mine.” That’s when I realized there was someone else there. Somehow I knew it was my older sister. I pulled my legs away, getting them as far from her as possible. I didn’t want her there. Why was she there intruding on this special moment? 

I continued to talk with Ray and was transported to another place – the inside of my garage. I was standing facing the back where we park all the bicycles. There was a spot that was empty, a spot meant for Ray’s bike. The empty spot caused me to start crying, grieving what could’ve been. The reason his bike wasn’t there was because he never arrived and he never would.

My decision, the one that shifted my path to the one I’m on now, was brought to my attention. I saw myself eating a hefty bowl of oatmeal and knew instantly what it symbolized. Long ago, in an OBE, I was given the dream symbolism of oatmeal and cereal. They represent choices. Oatmeal is the choice to choose the wholesome, healthy path in life. It is boring, often bland and not entirely appealing. Cereal, on the other hand, is the less healthy option, it is full of sugar and doesn’t have many nutrients, but it tastes so good you want to eat a whole lot of it at once. My guide in the OBE said to me matter-of-factly, “Sometimes we want cereal.” lol

In this life, my choices tend towards oatmeal despite the temptations of all the cereal around me. Ray was no exception. I wanted so badly for what we had to be right but felt split because my gut told me to stay clear. Eventually, it was obvious why I felt I needed to be cautious. 

Understanding this, I was still very upset and continued to cry. 

As I cried, the dream continued but much more lucidly until it was more of a reverie than a dream. I remember wondering why my sister was there and seeing the scene from above myself. I could barely see Ray to my left. Instead, my focus was on my sister. She was quite a distance away, but still in the same “bed” (in my personal space). Her energy was super needy and repelled me. I wanted nothing to do with her. This is when I heard, “Paypal” and saw the “#” symbol. The answer, which I didn’t want to hear, had to do with paying a debt to a friend (Pay Pal). When I saw the “#” I thought, “Pound” and my understanding of that was “weight”, weight in terms of balancing the energetic or karmic scales. 

Symbolism

Roses are love. The fact that this one is dried up and dying symbolizes a lost or dead love. The butterflies, however, indicate there is beauty and transformation to be found in the death of this love. The moth also indicates a transformation in progress but this one is less obvious. Perhaps a subconscious transformation of the feminine indicating hidden potential that has yet to take flight?

Laying in the grass/bed is symbolic of a place where I feel safe and protected. The fact that Ray is just a head is intriguing to me. I have concluded that it is indicative of what is left of our connection. It did feel like there will be fewer and fewer of these encounters from here and out, as if he has completed most of his lessons.

My sister in this bed space is not wanted, nor are her cold feet. Cold feet symbolizes fear or changing one’s mind. Since they belong to my sister, this could be an indicator of her current state, which does make sense because she has been operating out of fear for over a decade now. 

The garage symbolizes lack of moment. You park a car in a garage and cars symbolize one’s life path. So a parked life path. I had wanted Ray’s bike to be in my garage but it wasn’t. Bicycles also symbolize the life path but one in which only the individual travels. 

Overall, I find the dream to be informative, though not at all what I would like to hear. Obviously, my life is in a “parked” state. This is not necessarily bad. I have chosen to remain as I am, in my marriage, job and other relationships, until my children are out of high school and maybe even a bit longer than that. This choice is based upon my love for them and a desire that they have the best start to adulthood that they can possibly get. While I am sad that my encounters with Ray will eventually cease altogether, I am okay with it. I will always cherish the experience and memory of what was. As for my sister, I have asked for whatever contract I had with her to be dissolved. If this can’t be done for whatever reason, all I can do is pray that whatever I agreed to do to balance the scales, I do well.